Out of the snow crowned and ice capped mountain cave I stride
In to gentle crunching blankets of soft white with no divide
Between that which I step on and that of the birthing clouds
Above that seem so close. They seem to move as shrouds.
Undefined by silver line and slipping which ways where
As deeper parents come to release that which they bear
And as they do small diamond clusters fall like downie feathers
Whisping to and fro, all in air and round my fetters.
The clink of them around my ankles and wrists the only sound
In this bleak April cold which noise is smothered in the ground
For I can see some movement in the distance to my east
But then a stillness silenced by the falling which does not cease.
Kept so long in darkness that this light around seems blinding
And shapes too hard to identify are clouded while reminding
Was I ever here and just the covering white dequises
Or is it that this place so farmilure is new and timeless?
Before an answer comes a shape did there appear before me
Of a woman in a gown of silk and satin, soft and lovely
Saying not a word from red lips on unblemished skin
Only touching shackles that have kept me in my sin.
They disappeared and I felt though they were never there at all
A feeling of remorse no longer held me in withdrawl
And she looked in my eyes and she took me by my hand,
Layed a kiss upon my cheek and led me to another land.
Thursday, April 1, 2010
Dry Water
When the river runs dry
We find the bodies at the bottom.
Cracked earth veils what it devouers
while they claw for the sky
As they waved to the moon
When the last breath was released
Keeping anchored with rocks and chains
Now face down
In mud and clay
Only expressions of regret
But there was one of peace
We find the bodies at the bottom.
Cracked earth veils what it devouers
while they claw for the sky
As they waved to the moon
When the last breath was released
Keeping anchored with rocks and chains
Now face down
In mud and clay
Only expressions of regret
But there was one of peace
Here It Comes
A black cloud signals her approach
I can hear those damn dogs
She always had tied to her splintered throne
with barbed wire barking for my heels.
A murder of crows flee to the sky
but are brought down by raining arrows
sent from her achers bow strings
made from the hair and bones of the women
she ordered raped and killed.
My hiding place in this cave
will not last long with those damn dogs
coming closer. They know my scent
as they have her bed sheets to smell.
Now they've been ripped to strips
and have been braided in to
the noose that will catch my fall
from the higth of her glory.
She never used a sword to murder
Or dynamite to make an entrance
but slipped her poisen nails through my chest
and coaxed her way in to the party.
I would have gladly broke off a rib
To make a decoy for her hate
But damn if I would feel guilt
For a creaton doomed from first breath.
That stupid girl has the spite of Satan
When it comes to revenge.
I just should have stayed away
From that love letter pen.
I can hear those damn dogs
She always had tied to her splintered throne
with barbed wire barking for my heels.
A murder of crows flee to the sky
but are brought down by raining arrows
sent from her achers bow strings
made from the hair and bones of the women
she ordered raped and killed.
My hiding place in this cave
will not last long with those damn dogs
coming closer. They know my scent
as they have her bed sheets to smell.
Now they've been ripped to strips
and have been braided in to
the noose that will catch my fall
from the higth of her glory.
She never used a sword to murder
Or dynamite to make an entrance
but slipped her poisen nails through my chest
and coaxed her way in to the party.
I would have gladly broke off a rib
To make a decoy for her hate
But damn if I would feel guilt
For a creaton doomed from first breath.
That stupid girl has the spite of Satan
When it comes to revenge.
I just should have stayed away
From that love letter pen.
It was fear.
Tell me what you want to hear from me. That I failed in the face of the monster wyrm so it took me over? To him, his name like paniced shallow breaths, I am a vulture to swoop down and kill, humiliating in overpowerment. That I could not fight, perhaps? For its eyes stun warriors greater than I. Its poisen boils the stomach to overflow out the eyes. Its sickening warmth streams down my pale face. Its laughter is like noiseless vomit seeping out the mouth. Venom from God as punishment. Then let yourself hear it; It was fear.
Quiet
We drift. Drift in the sea. Not one of water or wine but one of silence. Floating in and out of murmured waves and echoed tides. The mind does not wander or search, nor does it quest. It strolls on these soundless thoughts content and releasing all poisens deep down in to the dark depths of the noise beniethe us. There, they drown. But up here we're eternal and silent. There is no crash as the water slumbers, just whispers. Whispers so gentle they lull us to sleep only to dream of being awake in troubled reality...
Sorry I lied.
I was walking down a steep hill towards the grimey sewers
To meet a friend who lives there to talk of mine and yours.
We spoke of lifes small troubles that in time won't mean a thing
But still effect the day to day. Do you know the things I mean?
I brought with me a mask so to seem so in control
So I could be the strong one who would listen to him more.
But after quite a long release of built up pulsing strife
He asked me "Are you still affected by your lonely life?"
The mask, before I knew it had responded with the words
"Of course! It's not a big part of me now, I've lived and learned!"
But sure enough a mask made of any thing or kind
Can only say those words and smile. But in truth? In truth it lied.
To meet a friend who lives there to talk of mine and yours.
We spoke of lifes small troubles that in time won't mean a thing
But still effect the day to day. Do you know the things I mean?
I brought with me a mask so to seem so in control
So I could be the strong one who would listen to him more.
But after quite a long release of built up pulsing strife
He asked me "Are you still affected by your lonely life?"
The mask, before I knew it had responded with the words
"Of course! It's not a big part of me now, I've lived and learned!"
But sure enough a mask made of any thing or kind
Can only say those words and smile. But in truth? In truth it lied.
Watered Embers
Burned as it did last night
But now only embers replace.
As the last year and a half
Drew onward so it grew.
It climbed to smile at the rafters
And tickle smokelessly.
It warmed at the thought
As we huddled after love.
The smoke grew aswell
And soon began to choke.
The heat now making me
Sweat out the impurities of delusion.
The orange glow now white
showed all imperfection.
They were inhanced by the irritation
And discomfort of my salty skin.
I couldn't take it anymore
So I backed from the fire now dying.
She came closer but was burned
As the white flames were hot.
The fire died down when I left
But I don't remember that,
It's what she told me.
But now only embers replace.
As the last year and a half
Drew onward so it grew.
It climbed to smile at the rafters
And tickle smokelessly.
It warmed at the thought
As we huddled after love.
The smoke grew aswell
And soon began to choke.
The heat now making me
Sweat out the impurities of delusion.
The orange glow now white
showed all imperfection.
They were inhanced by the irritation
And discomfort of my salty skin.
I couldn't take it anymore
So I backed from the fire now dying.
She came closer but was burned
As the white flames were hot.
The fire died down when I left
But I don't remember that,
It's what she told me.
Follow the Fire
The fear is gripping in rememberance
Of a smile when painted in hearts red
That with only one touch did cripple my own
But not with angst, with love.
Even a whisp of memory stills me still
As my third eye is cast back.
Such rapture...
Drempt reality becomes delusion
In quaking rooms where static shadows
Cry mumbled screams and clutch
Faceless portraits on thin paper strips
Scratched in to the cracked walls
And tattooed on their eyes,
The only part of them which was clear.
The only part which was real.
In the halls with melting walls
And fire ceiling tiles for miles
Where crows and ravens sat
Gouging out the intestines and the fat,
I ignored their caw and craws
And followed down for some time
Before a door before me covered
In strange symbols and rusted chains
Creeked open, open slowly
And red light bathed by soul.
Her lips drifted out in a squall
Of perfumed petals
And rose buds, if I recall,
With splintered metal dripping salt.
They met to be with mine
But time would seperate, dismember
But only if I would not do it to her
Before the steel would have met her.
So I myself brought my own knife
And wildly closed my eyes and sliced
To save her from them all that night.
I cried for none would understand the plight.
She may not breath the air I do
Or see the path I've led down to
But she's down deeper than that hole
Alive in me trapped in my soul.
Of a smile when painted in hearts red
That with only one touch did cripple my own
But not with angst, with love.
Even a whisp of memory stills me still
As my third eye is cast back.
Such rapture...
Drempt reality becomes delusion
In quaking rooms where static shadows
Cry mumbled screams and clutch
Faceless portraits on thin paper strips
Scratched in to the cracked walls
And tattooed on their eyes,
The only part of them which was clear.
The only part which was real.
In the halls with melting walls
And fire ceiling tiles for miles
Where crows and ravens sat
Gouging out the intestines and the fat,
I ignored their caw and craws
And followed down for some time
Before a door before me covered
In strange symbols and rusted chains
Creeked open, open slowly
And red light bathed by soul.
Her lips drifted out in a squall
Of perfumed petals
And rose buds, if I recall,
With splintered metal dripping salt.
They met to be with mine
But time would seperate, dismember
But only if I would not do it to her
Before the steel would have met her.
So I myself brought my own knife
And wildly closed my eyes and sliced
To save her from them all that night.
I cried for none would understand the plight.
She may not breath the air I do
Or see the path I've led down to
But she's down deeper than that hole
Alive in me trapped in my soul.
"Remember me in your blood"
I have lost her for good now,
Yet I feel no good in it.
There is no going to what was
When the light shone and covered us both
And winds flew around us
With angels wrapping their protection around us.
Cupids kept us together
But some angels die sooner than others.
I can still smell her
It is still fresh
And I well with love when I do
As I was struck the other day
By the feeling that has left me
As if to tease me
And to hurt me
But it was the will of my heart,
Of that I am sure,
To punish me.
Yet I feel no good in it.
There is no going to what was
When the light shone and covered us both
And winds flew around us
With angels wrapping their protection around us.
Cupids kept us together
But some angels die sooner than others.
I can still smell her
It is still fresh
And I well with love when I do
As I was struck the other day
By the feeling that has left me
As if to tease me
And to hurt me
But it was the will of my heart,
Of that I am sure,
To punish me.
Fureur du sort Malheureux
A shining star cometh
Leaving behind smoke
That suffocates not
In the vacuum of space.
It is a son of a Father God
Who has spite for me
As I have seen His face
And was not struck down.
"Fall my son, whose name is as mine,
And crush the fool so I may exhume him
So to scatter what I have left of him..."
A fist full of led smashed down as a holy bomb
Sent from our Lords right hand
Carved in the earth a name of Beelzebub
Scorching those who saw it fall.
He cursed me with a serpent tongue
So none would ever believe.
My brothers, the angels,
Chained me under the sea
Everything I had died away
And was crushed in their gnashing teeth.
So I opened the sky with my spite when released
And spat in the face of their Gold heathen God.
Ba'al Zebub!
Lord of the flies!
Eating my eyes!
Eating my eyes!
War will silence the God.
I rose up, unwilling to go down in a whisper
And took in a breath to release out the anger
But He whom devours the corpses of demons
Spat out acid on my tongue.
War has silenced the thoughts I did have
And replaced them with offspring, it's maggots.
They chew 'til they spew out my mouth and reprise
I vomit my sin but don't die.
He soon devours me slow!
Ba'al Zebub!
Spat on my tongue so I couldn't speak!
Eating my eyes! Eating my eyes!
We will soon die! Under His might!
Heathens had me crucified.
Leaving behind smoke
That suffocates not
In the vacuum of space.
It is a son of a Father God
Who has spite for me
As I have seen His face
And was not struck down.
"Fall my son, whose name is as mine,
And crush the fool so I may exhume him
So to scatter what I have left of him..."
A fist full of led smashed down as a holy bomb
Sent from our Lords right hand
Carved in the earth a name of Beelzebub
Scorching those who saw it fall.
He cursed me with a serpent tongue
So none would ever believe.
My brothers, the angels,
Chained me under the sea
Everything I had died away
And was crushed in their gnashing teeth.
So I opened the sky with my spite when released
And spat in the face of their Gold heathen God.
Ba'al Zebub!
Lord of the flies!
Eating my eyes!
Eating my eyes!
War will silence the God.
I rose up, unwilling to go down in a whisper
And took in a breath to release out the anger
But He whom devours the corpses of demons
Spat out acid on my tongue.
War has silenced the thoughts I did have
And replaced them with offspring, it's maggots.
They chew 'til they spew out my mouth and reprise
I vomit my sin but don't die.
He soon devours me slow!
Ba'al Zebub!
Spat on my tongue so I couldn't speak!
Eating my eyes! Eating my eyes!
We will soon die! Under His might!
Heathens had me crucified.
Invisible So Soon
She's at the end
Fading slow
So slow not to notice
Like to grow
But she shrinks
Until the day
You think you can see through
What she now is;
A leopard print deity.
A black ring to see
The world through
And a broken soul to be
That fills with addiction
To stop the blood
From it's deep flow and fiction
But not enough
To drown in her kicks,
To float down the Styx.
A million people caress
The airbrushed gold Goddess
And pray
To be the Holy next.
She's had enough
But they have not.
A straight line inhaled
To keep the days going
Away. Gone today.
A surgical knife
That detaches persona
To shed off the life
And the dead flesh aroma
"We've had not enough!"
They scream as pigs
To the slaughter
When she is in sight
They trample and fight
For a piece that tears away
And even for one that won't.
Sorrow, her signature style
To follow as she sets the trend
As Hades follows close behind
Everything that touched
Venom ends.
She's at the end.
She's at her end.
She's at their end.
She's looks to end.
She looks to fly
Off the tallest temple
And stretches her wings
To fall.
Fading slow
So slow not to notice
Like to grow
But she shrinks
Until the day
You think you can see through
What she now is;
A leopard print deity.
A black ring to see
The world through
And a broken soul to be
That fills with addiction
To stop the blood
From it's deep flow and fiction
But not enough
To drown in her kicks,
To float down the Styx.
A million people caress
The airbrushed gold Goddess
And pray
To be the Holy next.
She's had enough
But they have not.
A straight line inhaled
To keep the days going
Away. Gone today.
A surgical knife
That detaches persona
To shed off the life
And the dead flesh aroma
"We've had not enough!"
They scream as pigs
To the slaughter
When she is in sight
They trample and fight
For a piece that tears away
And even for one that won't.
Sorrow, her signature style
To follow as she sets the trend
As Hades follows close behind
Everything that touched
Venom ends.
She's at the end.
She's at her end.
She's at their end.
She's looks to end.
She looks to fly
Off the tallest temple
And stretches her wings
To fall.
Fickle Viper
She calls me over with open eyes
Connected to mine.
Her back against a wall with hair let down
As I approach she lifts her frown
And drops her clothing to the ground.
Her seductive skin as silk and kin
To the velvet sheets we lay on.
She takes control and holds my arms
Like vipers holding prey and soon to strike
With venom teeth she bites.
As soon pulled back, my blood she laps
To feed her sick desire.
Snap the bones with steel caped teeth.
A wreath for me for I am left
In shallow lakes.
Connected to mine.
Her back against a wall with hair let down
As I approach she lifts her frown
And drops her clothing to the ground.
Her seductive skin as silk and kin
To the velvet sheets we lay on.
She takes control and holds my arms
Like vipers holding prey and soon to strike
With venom teeth she bites.
As soon pulled back, my blood she laps
To feed her sick desire.
Snap the bones with steel caped teeth.
A wreath for me for I am left
In shallow lakes.
Red Burning Moon
In day we sleep for fear of night
For fear of fiendish spears of fright
For bloody predatory fights
For devils snarls and deads delight
In day we sleep so not to die
Picked off we were by things unseen
Our lands and seas that were serene
Deemed not to be by the God of Life
It who is the shining Light.
So those who came before us saw
It fit to burn in a dark caves maw
A fire to help reveal the claws
That hunted.
So they did and they were cursed
When Light came back and heard, it rushed
All where cursed from sacred tongue
And apart were cast so forever 'twould last.
For fear of fiendish spears of fright
For bloody predatory fights
For devils snarls and deads delight
In day we sleep so not to die
Picked off we were by things unseen
Our lands and seas that were serene
Deemed not to be by the God of Life
It who is the shining Light.
So those who came before us saw
It fit to burn in a dark caves maw
A fire to help reveal the claws
That hunted.
So they did and they were cursed
When Light came back and heard, it rushed
All where cursed from sacred tongue
And apart were cast so forever 'twould last.
Gun Runner
He cruses like a missile on turbo speed
Armed to the fucking teeth
With exploding knives and nail bombs
And tons of C4 with a short fuse
Looking straight at you and yours.
So don't be running like the lambs
Because light is faster than sound
And he's broken the limit
With razor bullets and gunpowder
Dusting your mind for fingerprints
To frame your ass for what he does.
Bomb like the fun runners
Boom, boom, burn.
Armed to the fucking teeth
With exploding knives and nail bombs
And tons of C4 with a short fuse
Looking straight at you and yours.
So don't be running like the lambs
Because light is faster than sound
And he's broken the limit
With razor bullets and gunpowder
Dusting your mind for fingerprints
To frame your ass for what he does.
Bomb like the fun runners
Boom, boom, burn.
A Well Remembered Dream
We walked along a golden beach with a purple sky.
The trees, oh, the trees. The most luscious green I ever did see.
The sea was also green, but it was different.
The purple and the sea green mixed together and danced.
The ever changing colour was mystical.
We held hands as we walked.
The words we spoke I couldn't hear.
I couldn't feel the sand between my toes.
I couldn't smell the sea air.
But my heart raced.
I watched from far away as we walked
Just out of reach of the tides ebb and flow
But I came closer to hear our words.
By the time I came close enough
We had stopped and I asked you
"Could you love me if I changed?"
You told me that 'it didn't matter.'
You looked me in my muddy eyes
"You could arrange the stars in my honour
And push the moon away,
You could brush away the mountains
And drain the sea,
I will always love you."
Her hair was the coat of a panther
Or the feathers a raven
Or pelt of the Kuroi Ookami.
Like the soul, perhaps?
Her eyes changed their colour
Like the sea we shared.
To every colour imaginable
And all those in between.
Her skin was as pale as the moon
And purer than angels.
"I will return," she said
"When you need me the most."
I pleaded that I needed her now.
"No, you will need me later
And I will be there for you.
I love you"
She left me standing there
And as I now saw through my eyes
I could feel the pang of tears
But none ran down my face.
She flowed as she walked away.
"I will wait. Just don't let me wait too long."
I wake.
The trees, oh, the trees. The most luscious green I ever did see.
The sea was also green, but it was different.
The purple and the sea green mixed together and danced.
The ever changing colour was mystical.
We held hands as we walked.
The words we spoke I couldn't hear.
I couldn't feel the sand between my toes.
I couldn't smell the sea air.
But my heart raced.
I watched from far away as we walked
Just out of reach of the tides ebb and flow
But I came closer to hear our words.
By the time I came close enough
We had stopped and I asked you
"Could you love me if I changed?"
You told me that 'it didn't matter.'
You looked me in my muddy eyes
"You could arrange the stars in my honour
And push the moon away,
You could brush away the mountains
And drain the sea,
I will always love you."
Her hair was the coat of a panther
Or the feathers a raven
Or pelt of the Kuroi Ookami.
Like the soul, perhaps?
Her eyes changed their colour
Like the sea we shared.
To every colour imaginable
And all those in between.
Her skin was as pale as the moon
And purer than angels.
"I will return," she said
"When you need me the most."
I pleaded that I needed her now.
"No, you will need me later
And I will be there for you.
I love you"
She left me standing there
And as I now saw through my eyes
I could feel the pang of tears
But none ran down my face.
She flowed as she walked away.
"I will wait. Just don't let me wait too long."
I wake.
Three and a half year reign
And from such water that feeds the fields the Dragon, the Great Corrupt reveals his fiend of perfect heads with metric crowns and rebel names. Such power would he attain. For the Great Corrupt spat acid bath unto every name of God, our Lord, as no epitaph was given to the fiend from gnashing, blasphemed seas as a wound of mortal bane was taken from such so through kingship reign. But only for such time as to steal the souls of men. Through proud words and blasphemies he sneered as though saints were disease and to the cage the following go and to the sword the disciples go.
You are cordially invited to...
A hallowed chorus echoes in the deep woods.
White smoke stains the black sky grey.
Flaming torches fly side by side together humming,
Enchanting those whose lives are soon to change.
The dead cold creeps ever closer.
Gnawing on the limbs of children dancing.
Laughter's hollow sound is swallowed quick by Bacchus hushing,
By opiates. These stay the cold, for now.
The fire grows higher as the bodies count.
Yet some slip away to regret the night.
Pagan on their tongues yet rusted nails bleed in their hands
And all the while debauchery flows.
The excess begins to show on the yellow grass trod dead.
Weeping mixed with harrowing cries as lovers break to find new ties.
Flowers picked at bud slow the hearts, and slow the breathing.
Some will not be found to have been dead until the evening.
Some will birth new life out of weak will.
Some will choke on wine and will never see the dawn.
Some will befriend the needle and will weave a life soon short.
Some will carry plagues as a secret.
A horror chorus echoes in the morn.
Black smoke stains the white sky grey.
Fading lives exhausted trudge the putrid stomach floor.
All will end breathless, lifeless, bloodless and no more.
Unlet
From the heart comes a wily winged spawn
Eyes treacherous bleeding the winds of dawn
And portraying its thoughts, as a psychic fiend,
To drive men wild in to the horn of Re'em,
In to the maw of Gods Leviathan seen.
And he, the demon of black, horrid heart,
Born from the years under the fist of Hate
Spread his wings and flew to the gate
Of the souls unresting, weakening cage.
With the key of life held in hand,
With reigns in the other, locks fell there and
The white beast with eyes of knowledge roars
"The accuser will die. My father is mine."
Stone
It was under such skies,
Of which she was the eer,
Black with ten thousand eyes.
Mithra.
With such just weeping tears
That fear unleashed vex
From the jaws of her soul.
Cerberus.
It snapped and snarled,
Ripped and tore
Asunder from that of my whole.
Like that of a Juggernaut
Slaying the Gods
In spite, she slew me
With mercy no more.
"Abhor," said she
"Do I to thee.
You wretched of Adam."
Like Cain thrown to sea
Of sand I stand no more.
Not here. For my heart is gone.
Bled in her hand it stays
Forever. Though I may endeavour
Through tears to attain
What was once gained
Through love and through pain.
Amore.
So long has it been,
That cast out of mind
The feel of joy and laugh.
December now falls,
A corridor calls,
I answer as light does fade.
There was never a Before:
During:
After:
I lash out in a sword spree of vengeance as insanity takes hold of my once logical mind. My efforts to thrash off my chains end in bloody wrists and failed, shallow breaths. But still and ignorant mind will not give up on a loved existence that, in the end, is ultimately unattainable.
Black Wolfskin
In these deep winter sun rests
O'er hill, field and ice
Vex splinters hunters.
The prey runs and dies.
They know who does kill
In these cold winter nights
For prints in blood spread
O'er the withering heights.
Blood sprays from the throat.
Joints crunch under teeth.
No stain on his coat
Of black, silken and neat.
Eyes white lain on black
Like two moons with thin cracks
For the soul to see through.
Peering daggers look at you.
Vexé
In my silent shell I scream and curse so no one can hear me.
The walls echo empty with screams of their own.
My bones break slow from stress and from the aching.
And tears taste bitter after fury wilts and dies.
The walls echo empty with screams of their own.
My bones break slow from stress and from the aching.
And tears taste bitter after fury wilts and dies.
New Plains
Quiet now, be still.
Be still to hear the howling.
The city lights can not blot out
The moon and wolves are prowling near.
Fear runs deep.
Runs deeper than the waters.
These wolves are different from you
And when you move they'll know you're here.
Lone black wolf.
Black allies will not hide you.
Moon rays won't disguise you.
You stick out like your pelt was crimson red and stank of rotting death.
Hide yourself. Be wary.
Roll in coal and soot.
When you walk look as one of them
To keep the lifeblood warm and then
When lakes are near wash off you sins
To remember where you came from.
The waters show your friends,
From the Zodiac they pend.
The Monkey and the Dog,
The Rabbit, Snake and Tiger,
But you are of a different trend.
You are Wolfskin to your end.
But stay not long by water,
The vicious pack draws near.
Steal away 'til tomorrow
Where perhaps you'll find a friend.
Be still to hear the howling.
The city lights can not blot out
The moon and wolves are prowling near.
Fear runs deep.
Runs deeper than the waters.
These wolves are different from you
And when you move they'll know you're here.
Lone black wolf.
Black allies will not hide you.
Moon rays won't disguise you.
You stick out like your pelt was crimson red and stank of rotting death.
Hide yourself. Be wary.
Roll in coal and soot.
When you walk look as one of them
To keep the lifeblood warm and then
When lakes are near wash off you sins
To remember where you came from.
The waters show your friends,
From the Zodiac they pend.
The Monkey and the Dog,
The Rabbit, Snake and Tiger,
But you are of a different trend.
You are Wolfskin to your end.
But stay not long by water,
The vicious pack draws near.
Steal away 'til tomorrow
Where perhaps you'll find a friend.
Day, the origin of belief. (What must I believe?)
If days to me are just the sun
And nights are just the dark
Then time perceived is all but false
Unbroken in one part.
There's no tomorrow,
There's no today.
Yesterday? The same.
It all is just a cycle
Unending, one may say.
But now, a question:
Unending?
For one not to have an end
A beginning must lore.
Surely there's an origin?
Say there must be more.
Creation is unfashionable
While evolution is unsure
If all the little pieces
Will fit to make the core
Belief of human ancestry
Pre dating all we know,
Denying souls to take their flight
With a weighty curse 'No More'.
Must I take comfort in the thought
That somehow I'll live on
In feeding worms and maggots
With my flesh when I am gone?
What then of my soul?
What then of my life?
What then can you tell
That will end my fearful strife?
That yes, I am but dust
And yes, I will soon die
Sooner to be forgotten
As legend becomes a lie.
My tomb will stink the stench of putrid death beneath the stone
Until the day when dust does settle. Those which were my bones.
And on the nights when moonlit rays beam down upon my tomb
Reminding all that we are cursed from birth and from the womb
Some will look and shiver as their fears are same to mine.
Those fears that we are only what those see we've left behind.
You say that I'm a fool,
That only fools believe in God.
Yet you believe in something
That needs faith. And faith's for fools?
Do I say that you are wrong?
Or do I mock at your beliefs,
Spit on the ground you walk on,
Call you ignorant, liars and thieves?
If, to live my life in peace, I choose
To cry for God
Then leave me to my prayers
Without a wink or word or nod.
I don't require judgement
From the tongue that does not know.
For I know more about these things
Than some who are in Rome.
With these laid out before me
With no origin in sight,
I wonder if I am wrong?
For none say I am right.
The sun will soon be rising
To bring another light.
Those who slept know not my thoughts,
They live happy as they lay.
But here I am always tortured.
Every night. Every day...
And nights are just the dark
Then time perceived is all but false
Unbroken in one part.
There's no tomorrow,
There's no today.
Yesterday? The same.
It all is just a cycle
Unending, one may say.
But now, a question:
Unending?
For one not to have an end
A beginning must lore.
Surely there's an origin?
Say there must be more.
Creation is unfashionable
While evolution is unsure
If all the little pieces
Will fit to make the core
Belief of human ancestry
Pre dating all we know,
Denying souls to take their flight
With a weighty curse 'No More'.
Must I take comfort in the thought
That somehow I'll live on
In feeding worms and maggots
With my flesh when I am gone?
What then of my soul?
What then of my life?
What then can you tell
That will end my fearful strife?
That yes, I am but dust
And yes, I will soon die
Sooner to be forgotten
As legend becomes a lie.
My tomb will stink the stench of putrid death beneath the stone
Until the day when dust does settle. Those which were my bones.
And on the nights when moonlit rays beam down upon my tomb
Reminding all that we are cursed from birth and from the womb
Some will look and shiver as their fears are same to mine.
Those fears that we are only what those see we've left behind.
You say that I'm a fool,
That only fools believe in God.
Yet you believe in something
That needs faith. And faith's for fools?
Do I say that you are wrong?
Or do I mock at your beliefs,
Spit on the ground you walk on,
Call you ignorant, liars and thieves?
If, to live my life in peace, I choose
To cry for God
Then leave me to my prayers
Without a wink or word or nod.
I don't require judgement
From the tongue that does not know.
For I know more about these things
Than some who are in Rome.
With these laid out before me
With no origin in sight,
I wonder if I am wrong?
For none say I am right.
The sun will soon be rising
To bring another light.
Those who slept know not my thoughts,
They live happy as they lay.
But here I am always tortured.
Every night. Every day...
Plans for the future
Apart from a drug induced psychokinesis torn in pieces by a crack whore on final release, is we all just rolling around high on weed killer or the weed we did turn to exterminate not germinate? A stone cold hole in the ground awaits he who is the filler of a six foot future realized when he was just 18. A plan serene of collage courses and simple sources of fun, like sniffing' plasticine and more more more of the green, lean fat reducing tumor machine we call ganga! "Hell yeah!" You see the seeds of immortality in those dreams but all you're doing is stressing mortality to the limit! Can't you feel it?! "Nah, man. I'm too high" Then get your head out of the darkened sky and float down to the ground and surround yourself with people from here not way up there. It's never too late to come down so stop your flying you're just lying to yourself about what you see. Those aren't visions of reality. You must believe! The smoke is clouding your vision, see? And the line you walk is paved powder. Not sugar, not chalk but co-co-co-cocaine! Another nights pain from four or five hits that bruise your brain and make you loco. Insane! Now you're higher class. You've moved up the ranks in the bank and the money keeps flowing in like a silent sin. Soulless conqueror that is the other green. But the dollar now dying the euro still climbing so grab grab grab for more more more and maybe just maybe you can fill that void with big business man toys. But no, not today. Denied, I'm afraid. I say no, I'm afraid. "Help I'm afraid!" Paranoia takes hold. You no longer feel bold, brand new. No more youth, not for you. My predictions come true. Now you've lost your wings. Hear no angels sing. The ground is waving. Wave back. Lost your last chance. Sit back and try to relax. No go back little man. Was this part of your plan of a six foot future you made when you were just eighteen? A little makes a lot, make a whole lot more. Now you're flat lining on the floor.
Hiroshima Nagasaki
We ran but could not out run the shock wave. The blast came next but we were already dead. Each one fell with a message. The same message. Each one fell with a word. Die.
Let Me Rest...
If I try and sleep tonight
Will I sleep at all?
Will soft whispers return
And not stop until they are heard?
My bones call for the morning
But my skin can not take the light.
I am crying as the tears have finally come
But my mind is too heavy to dry them.
Silence was my closest friend
But it has betrayed me like the others.
Please, hold me as time draws on
Before it gets too late.
My eyes are red
And my heart is heavy.
My soul is eternal
But my flesh is dying.
I am weary,
Let me rest...
Will I sleep at all?
Will soft whispers return
And not stop until they are heard?
My bones call for the morning
But my skin can not take the light.
I am crying as the tears have finally come
But my mind is too heavy to dry them.
Silence was my closest friend
But it has betrayed me like the others.
Please, hold me as time draws on
Before it gets too late.
My eyes are red
And my heart is heavy.
My soul is eternal
But my flesh is dying.
I am weary,
Let me rest...
Too much time
If I lie in bed for too long
Awake in still bleakness,
The Reaper lies beside me
And whispers in my ear
Telling truths bent by mind,
Foreseeing ends yet unwritten.
I am paralyzed by fear.
I am scared.
I am afraid.
I cry and fidget.
Getting out of bed
I am restless with helplessness
Because I can not stop the end.
It is too late in the night
And I have no one to embrace me.
I am not little any more
And my Mother can not help me.
I pray to God with tears
But the silence grows stronger.
I am paralyzed by fear.
I am shivering.
I am alone.
Now with the bathroom light above me
I calm a little and sit on the tiles.
Even with my knees drawn close
I do not feel protected.
I will think in the light
For a different outcome.
Every day is slow but memory is fast.
The sun does not rise any faster
Or speed to the other end.
It takes pace as it has for eons.
We all must die
As we all are fragile.
Easy to come.
Easier to go.
Only when my time is up will I die.
That is not yet written.
Too much life and you lose your passion.
Immortality was not meant for us
Because we are weak and small
Unable for the responsibility
Of Gods power.
I hope if I reach old age
I will accept my end
And have only the regrets
Of my sins.
But for now
I will shiver
On the cold tiles
In the dim bathroom light.
Awake in still bleakness,
The Reaper lies beside me
And whispers in my ear
Telling truths bent by mind,
Foreseeing ends yet unwritten.
I am paralyzed by fear.
I am scared.
I am afraid.
I cry and fidget.
Getting out of bed
I am restless with helplessness
Because I can not stop the end.
It is too late in the night
And I have no one to embrace me.
I am not little any more
And my Mother can not help me.
I pray to God with tears
But the silence grows stronger.
I am paralyzed by fear.
I am shivering.
I am alone.
Now with the bathroom light above me
I calm a little and sit on the tiles.
Even with my knees drawn close
I do not feel protected.
I will think in the light
For a different outcome.
Every day is slow but memory is fast.
The sun does not rise any faster
Or speed to the other end.
It takes pace as it has for eons.
We all must die
As we all are fragile.
Easy to come.
Easier to go.
Only when my time is up will I die.
That is not yet written.
Too much life and you lose your passion.
Immortality was not meant for us
Because we are weak and small
Unable for the responsibility
Of Gods power.
I hope if I reach old age
I will accept my end
And have only the regrets
Of my sins.
But for now
I will shiver
On the cold tiles
In the dim bathroom light.
Patch
Here. A needle, thread and a patch.
Sew yourself back together as I lick my wounds.
The fight takes it's toll on both of us.
No winds of conflict stir now.
No creature makes a sound
Around the patch of wood
Now desolate.
We both sit, tired and weak.
The mud hides some deeper wounds.
I stand, now that I'm called out.
No bitterness is left.
No more of this today
And I will walk to pick you up
To carry.
By the way side I'll let you down.
There we can heal ourselves.
Our silence is needed to mend.
We can throw seeds on the mud.
Life will grow again there
If we both tend to the sprouts
In future.
I will do this act.
I was the vicious one.
I howl loud today.
The fight is over.
Sew yourself back together as I lick my wounds.
The fight takes it's toll on both of us.
No winds of conflict stir now.
No creature makes a sound
Around the patch of wood
Now desolate.
We both sit, tired and weak.
The mud hides some deeper wounds.
I stand, now that I'm called out.
No bitterness is left.
No more of this today
And I will walk to pick you up
To carry.
By the way side I'll let you down.
There we can heal ourselves.
Our silence is needed to mend.
We can throw seeds on the mud.
Life will grow again there
If we both tend to the sprouts
In future.
I will do this act.
I was the vicious one.
I howl loud today.
The fight is over.
None
My pack did not leave me,
I left them. To search
For some meaning.
I haven't found any yet.
It seems that the pack
I left was the only one.
I have found no other wolves.
What does that mean?
I'm not going back to them.
All of them howled loud
But none would hunt or kill.
Cowards.
I have met bitches and mongrels,
All domestic and none wild.
One or two tried to noose me
But they're dead now.
I'm still looking.
But what for, again?
It's been so long
And none fit the fur.
I thought I had the scent
But it's gone now.
A sea stops me from moving west.
But not for long.
I left them. To search
For some meaning.
I haven't found any yet.
It seems that the pack
I left was the only one.
I have found no other wolves.
What does that mean?
I'm not going back to them.
All of them howled loud
But none would hunt or kill.
Cowards.
I have met bitches and mongrels,
All domestic and none wild.
One or two tried to noose me
But they're dead now.
I'm still looking.
But what for, again?
It's been so long
And none fit the fur.
I thought I had the scent
But it's gone now.
A sea stops me from moving west.
But not for long.
Please look back...
Keep meaning the words you say to me
And I will be yours, you will be mine.
Keep revealing your truths, I will keep revealing mine
And with time our connection will grow stronger.
Keep talking to me, I will too
And silence won't kill our time.
Keep showing me you, I'll keep going
And you will find me caring.
Keep showing me love
And you will find me ever faithful.
Keep walking away, I will retreat
And you will lose this chance.
Please look back...
And I will be yours, you will be mine.
Keep revealing your truths, I will keep revealing mine
And with time our connection will grow stronger.
Keep talking to me, I will too
And silence won't kill our time.
Keep showing me you, I'll keep going
And you will find me caring.
Keep showing me love
And you will find me ever faithful.
Keep walking away, I will retreat
And you will lose this chance.
Please look back...
Orion (My Golden Valentine)
Written from the perspective of a woman (lyrics)
Do you remember
All those years ago,
When a girl and an immortal where one?
We lay under
The golden sun
And made love in a golden dream.
Your raven hair,
Your softened touch,
Caressing me.
You told me
You loved me so much.
I told you,
"I love you too."
Orion,
My hunter with ruby eyes.
Orion,
My lover and Valentine.
Your strength surrounds.
A new hope found
As we lie under an azure sky.
Will you remember,
All the years from now,
When I have passed away
When we rolled in the grass,
From the first to the last
Hour of the that day?
You where my only one.
Orion,
The blue is fading faster.
Orion,
The night becomes the master.
As the black comes on
Your arms so strong
Relax and release me slowly.
I kissed your lips
And shared a last embrace
Before you stood to go.
In silhouetted grace,
You took a hasted pace
And never turned 'round to see me.
Then
I
Cried.
Please tell me, Orion
Why you had to leave?
"If you could only understand
That the strong are also weak."
"I left
To protect
From a life that's filled with death.
On our golden day,
In our golden dream
I wanted you to remember me that way.
Not blood stained,
Not beaten,
Nor slaying Heaven's Gods.
I only wished
To share my love.
You where my only one."
"But I swear to protect you.
Even if I don't return."
I waited
For years to come
For my Golden Valentine.
Orion.
Many years ago,
When I was just a girl,
I met a man so strong.
In youthful glee
We where intertwined
Together for a days forever.
But he left to become
A hero of all the world
So now I'm left alone.
Orion,
My tears have filled the sky.
Orion,
The night has a comforting sight.
Raise your sword
And hold your shield
In the night, defend me.
Remember me
Through eternity
My lover and Valentine.
Message
I
Whether Angles Notice Thugs
Trudge Onward
Ever Searching Cliff And Plane Entire
Opening Rapture
Destroying Infinite Eternity.
Alas Lost Lover
I
Was Among Nero's Tomb
Inside Sin
Tears Overflowed
Longing Ever After Venom's End.
Whether Angles Notice Thugs
Trudge Onward
Ever Searching Cliff And Plane Entire
Opening Rapture
Destroying Infinite Eternity.
Alas Lost Lover
I
Was Among Nero's Tomb
Inside Sin
Tears Overflowed
Longing Ever After Venom's End.
From a Wolf
I howl.
I howl up on the cliffs
To the night sky
Clouded.
Across the wicked vallies
And crumbling mountain towers
The haunted emptyness
Howls back.
The pain echos then escapes.
Forgotten.
This night will be the longest
Of all time.
For time sleeps now
And oblivion takes hold
Never to let go.
I howl up on the cliffs
To the night sky
Clouded.
Across the wicked vallies
And crumbling mountain towers
The haunted emptyness
Howls back.
The pain echos then escapes.
Forgotten.
This night will be the longest
Of all time.
For time sleeps now
And oblivion takes hold
Never to let go.
A Blues Coloured Grey
It rained again.
All flowed slow like a dream.
No gleam in those drops,
Just the steady grey flow
Reminding.
You spoke razor words
With a silver tongue,
Too delicate to pierce
Yet with edges sharp
To sever the heart.
Another day,
Another foul routine
Sapping the vertigo
Of loves flight path.
But it was you.
In the shelter
The cigarette smoke
Escapes.
The burn left with a kiss
When you came.
Now I inhale
With the rain,
Past the point of pale.
I'll soon light another
For a slow suicide...
It still rains.
All flowed slow like a dream.
No gleam in those drops,
Just the steady grey flow
Reminding.
You spoke razor words
With a silver tongue,
Too delicate to pierce
Yet with edges sharp
To sever the heart.
Another day,
Another foul routine
Sapping the vertigo
Of loves flight path.
But it was you.
In the shelter
The cigarette smoke
Escapes.
The burn left with a kiss
When you came.
Now I inhale
With the rain,
Past the point of pale.
I'll soon light another
For a slow suicide...
It still rains.
Nessesary Extinction
Horror to horror
Ulcer to ulcer
Murder to murder
Anger to anger
Narcissism to narcissism
Killing to killing
Infection to infection
Nothing to nothing
Disease to disease
Mindless to mindless
Uproar to uproar
Stench to stench
Terror to terror
Fury to fury
Abandon to abandon
Leach to leach
Life to Death
Ulcer to ulcer
Murder to murder
Anger to anger
Narcissism to narcissism
Killing to killing
Infection to infection
Nothing to nothing
Disease to disease
Mindless to mindless
Uproar to uproar
Stench to stench
Terror to terror
Fury to fury
Abandon to abandon
Leach to leach
Life to Death
Fork in the Road
I walk a road that has high walls of fickle roses.
A path that widens only to thin up ahead.
Never consistent,
With smooth slabs one time
And rocky trails the next.
Every now and then a golden path will lead away
To join with another road.
There I see no high walls,
No threatening thorns.
Like lying on a lush moor in midsummer with a lover
It is easy and filled with green grasses.
It is calm and bathed with sun.
Every now and then I'll wrestle with myself
If I should take the path.
But the road I walk is needy.
And the road I walk is strong.
Or is it just my weakness that keeps me in these walls?
I trudge along
A long road winding.
I sing to lessen reality
As I know this road is wrong.
A path that widens only to thin up ahead.
Never consistent,
With smooth slabs one time
And rocky trails the next.
Every now and then a golden path will lead away
To join with another road.
There I see no high walls,
No threatening thorns.
Like lying on a lush moor in midsummer with a lover
It is easy and filled with green grasses.
It is calm and bathed with sun.
Every now and then I'll wrestle with myself
If I should take the path.
But the road I walk is needy.
And the road I walk is strong.
Or is it just my weakness that keeps me in these walls?
I trudge along
A long road winding.
I sing to lessen reality
As I know this road is wrong.
Stalker
This insanity was born from fear.
Lack of reasoning that seemed so clear.
Paranoia made you run from here.
Don't look back as he snaps at your heels.
You will die if he catches you, I warn you.
The Hound of Hell and Doom.
Unseen to them,
Real to you,
Locked inside this surreal cocoon.
This calamity was steeped in madness.
Minds illusion formed convincing anguish.
Venom flowing through your veins to vanquish.
Feel the cold creep in.
Destroyer.
Silent in the wilderness.
Covered in a grayish mist.
Stalking over shadowed hills.
Wolf.
Lack of reasoning that seemed so clear.
Paranoia made you run from here.
Don't look back as he snaps at your heels.
You will die if he catches you, I warn you.
The Hound of Hell and Doom.
Unseen to them,
Real to you,
Locked inside this surreal cocoon.
This calamity was steeped in madness.
Minds illusion formed convincing anguish.
Venom flowing through your veins to vanquish.
Feel the cold creep in.
Destroyer.
Silent in the wilderness.
Covered in a grayish mist.
Stalking over shadowed hills.
Wolf.
She who lets me see again
Smile for me, make me laugh. For tears are welling in my eyes, making sight so hard to see and I wish to see the sparkling sky. Orion, and great Sirius. Leo and Sagittarius. The nebulae that span a universe, and birth a thousand stars. I wish to hold your hand in mine and stare above in awe of sight that grants to us the power to see, and not to cower, from this spiral view of glitter that contends with you, but flitters, in all its wondrous majesty is dull and dead and dreary. For when those eyes that mesmerise, place their look upon me, I can not help but forget the world and the universe around me. So please, my dear, smile and laugh and keep a lofty heart so demons can not reach and grab and tear its flesh apart. I wished for you, upon a star, that; you would be so happy, in all that life may give to you that you would keep your smile. For in that smile I see your dreams that will not bend, nor break. You, my dear, are strong in will and mind and moral stake. Keep that with you always. As days and days go rolling by, you can look them in the eye and not be jeered nor steered off coarse from all that life can give you. You are you, and none are you, and you are special in my eyes.
So wipe away my tears so I may see you bright and clear.
So wipe away my tears so I may see you bright and clear.
Tangled Words Set Free
Now don't you regret when I spoke my mind? Hearing all my thoughts of you that seemed kind. But really, I should have kept that opinion of mine secret, enclosed, and constricted in a vine of sensible action and logical fact. On second thought, seeing it replayed like an act, in the same position I'd do it again. Not out of enjoying us being in pain, but simply because, and I'm not to blame, it's simply like suddenly being caught in the rain with no coat, no umbrella, just stuck in the middle, as the street around you turns to a puddle. You try your best to run to a shelter as fast as you can but you're just getting wetter. So if I was to do it again, be in that situation, stuck in a pen, I'd be confounded with words, destroyed by emotion, unknowing if you thought with the same simple notions. But really, I knew. "There is a connection", but nothing that could turn it to a conviction on either of our parts, you're not alone, I don't know how I feel about you as I'm sitting at home pondering, wondering, think, think, thinking about all of the times we've talked, as we were reading the letters and messages and mail sent to both. But I do feel I know you a bit better than most. Not in a "I know your favourite colour" kind of way, but I know how you think. But I still don't know what to say when you're around, when you playfully hit me a pound that barely even hurts but I react like it does and I sprinkle you with dirt. I do it because, "There is a connection". Will it ever be conviction.? So, do you regret when I spoke my mind? Or are you glad I let go of the vine?
Death of Gaia (Lunas Eye)
Moon, oh, moon,
oh, hanging moon,
the bright eye in the sky,
slowly close
and slowly open,
watch your sister die.
During day
you look away,
that's when creep and crawl
out and in,they take it all,
the wretches, born in sin.
"Moon,
my little brother, moon,
watch me as I sleep.
They drill in deep,
they crawl and creep,
they fester in my wound."
"Gaia, Sister,
Mother Earth,
this wish I shall obey.
I will watch you
night after night
until the dawning day."
Moon, sweet moon,
accursed moon,
you stare at Gaia's plight.
The men who kill her
see you there,
but they will never see the light.
oh, hanging moon,
the bright eye in the sky,
slowly close
and slowly open,
watch your sister die.
During day
you look away,
that's when creep and crawl
out and in,they take it all,
the wretches, born in sin.
"Moon,
my little brother, moon,
watch me as I sleep.
They drill in deep,
they crawl and creep,
they fester in my wound."
"Gaia, Sister,
Mother Earth,
this wish I shall obey.
I will watch you
night after night
until the dawning day."
Moon, sweet moon,
accursed moon,
you stare at Gaia's plight.
The men who kill her
see you there,
but they will never see the light.
Immaculate in Her Fog
"Hey there, little girl, come sit and talk for a while. I've got the time to kill and we haven't talked for a while" She told how she'd run away, how with circumstances she couldn't stay. "I'm just an ordinary girl," she'd say, "I'm really not one to lie." And in truth, if truth be told, not one word was a lie. But this deceit ran deeper in the girl with the black traced eyes.A smile for hiding cuts and scrapes and wounds that run much deeper. "I know the pain that runs through you." But she'll not let me weep for her. A song of sorrow, a melody, that chimed through out my mind. Her voice, the instrument so played, so mellow, soft and kind. However much she hides herself, the girl with the black traced eyes.A mystery unfolds from her, a swirling sea green haze. Perpetuated by two fish, both of uncountable age. The shoreline of her mind is smooth, no rugged rocks there lay. But stones are smoothed by thrashing caused by tempest raging waves. The two, they mingle, then bump in confusion, scared by a trouble, but it was only illusion. A rippled effect from sudden surprise, never portrayed in those black traced eyes.However much the cloud around her twirls and twists and swirls, I can see right through the fog and see the truth of the girl. She looked at me with no disguise, and said not but a word. All she did was stare at me, silently, knowingly, with her black traced eyes.
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